Monday, May 19, 2008

Drink To The Foam

19 May. Today marks exactly one year since I was commissioned into the world's finest navy. What have I done since then?

DRINK TO THE FOAM.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

The Strong Will Never Fall

I find it incredibly dissatisfying to have so little true motivation, inspiration, in my life.  All that push me further into life seem so superficial, so short term in their ability to keep my spirits afloat, yet they seem to be the basis of modern life as we know it.  We want the best for ourselves and our kin, and the chance to provide the best seems to be rooted in the best opportunities that will provide you the best money.  The saying goes, "Money can't buy you happiness"; maybe it cannot, but maybe money can afford you a greater number of chances to attain your happiness, like buying as many bingo cards as you can afford to win that jackpot.

Perhaps I'm being too much of a romantic, a "bohemian", for life today, ignorant and blind to the goodness in my life and the other good I will acquire and achieve, but I envy those around me who seem to have their motivation intact, and abundant at that.  I hear them speak with excitement and fervor, bright eyed and propelled to do good for themselves.  It fills me with their same feelings, but soon it wears off; it is only temporary.  My joy was built, but there is no foundation.  I do not have a foundation, as they do, so my joy crumbles.  Maybe it's not as easy as I write it to seem, for those around me who I perceive as motivated.  Maybe their eyes are simply open to the goodness around us that I cannot seem to see but for a few moments.  Maybe their souls are just stronger than my own, able to wrestle and pin their desperate and untamed spirits.  But I hope that's not the case.  I want to be ignorant in my bliss, ignorant in my belief that everyone does find that inspiration, that muse, that pushes them to excel beyond their own limitations; pushes them to that promised land where they find their true life's happiness.  I want to remain blindly optimistic that mine is out there, and if only I search a little further for it, I'll have it.

This isn't a cry for hopeful encouragement, or a need for words of faith from others, friends and family, who want the best for me.  This is a question without a ready-and-waiting answer.  This is a thirst for greatness.  This is fear of a possible mid-life crisis, before the crisis.  This is me worrying about my life before I've even begun to live it.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Define "arrogant"

Have you ever sat around and told yourself that you're really NOT that interesting? And then you think about it, and turn and say, "You know what? You're right!" All of a sudden, you start brainstorming ways to make yourself more interesting; hobbies you should take up, music and movies you should listen to and watch, books you should read, trips and/or adventures you should take... but at the end of it, you're just spouting off things that interest you, and you stop when you realize you've just walked in a big circle, because if you're not interesting and your plan to become more interesting is to do things that interest you, aren't you just furthering your un-interesting-ness since you're not interesting to begin with?

Yeah, that sucks. Good thing it never happens to me.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

My Shitblog #2

My buddy, Mark Pando, has given me his great idea to make a weekly "2 times Tuesdays" blog, with one of my blogs being my shitblog. So... going with that, I take the first step in properly and CLEVERLY naming my weekly shitblog.

Watch the video and let me know what you think. Honestly, I can't say I'll listen to any of you who might leave something and that I won't just go off and pick which name I want to use, but what the hey; it's worth a shot.


video

Happy Birthday, Jersey Muscle!

And since you so graciously bestowed a limerick for me on my special day, so too shall I bestow a group of lines (a song) for you!

Little voice inside my ear
It's pitch too high for me to hear
No, I think it's something from
Down in New Jersey
Sticks, they magically appear
Always use your muscles here
Yes, a birthday for the
One, ymizlinzy
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, don't make me take another shot
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood, I think I'm gonna throw up
Happy Birthday!


I'm not sure this is the same melody I envisioned earlier, when I first wrote the song, but we'll go with it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JERSEY MUSCLE (sorry I can't carry a note)!

video

Monday, May 5, 2008

Ever Hear of the "SUPER WHIP"???

me: dang man
me: iron man made over 100mil this past weekend
migwel: i didnt see it
migwel: i saw made of honor instead

since I watched "The 40 Year Old Virgin" last night... a few excerpts that fit this situation:

David (Migwel): Did you just flick me in the balls?
Cal (Me): No. I flicked you in the fleshy patch where your balls used to be.

Cal: You know how I know YOU'RE gay?




YOU WENT TO WATCH "MADE OF HONOR" INSTEAD OF "IRON MAN".


WHAT. THE. FCK.


Friday, May 2, 2008

Tired of These Muthafckn Iron Men On This Muthafckn Plane

This totally made me jizz and crap my pants simultaneously. If you're an uber-comic geek like me, and especially if you've read "The Ultimates", created by Mark Millar and Bryan Hitch, STAY AFTER THE CREDITS TO GET THIS LITTLE EASTER EGG. YOU WILL END UP THE SAME AS ME: AN ECSTATIC MESS (in your pants).




And as a side reference, if you were interested in looking up the lyrics to Black Sabbath's "Iron Man", then prepare to be mind-fcked by the story behind the song. I totally think that should be turned into some sort of sci-fi novel/short story/TPB or something. Maybe an episode of the "Twilight Zone". It's got that creepy ironic ending to it, same as "Planet of the Apes".

UPDATE: As of today, 11 May 2008, I've seen the movie 3 times in movie theaters.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

My Shitblog

Before Ruben Medalla can steal my idea and become an internet demi-god due to it, I'm posting this intro video to make it official.

Shitblog #1


video

Best Knock Knock Joke EVARRR

Gonzo (9:22:58 AM): knock knock
Me (9:23:11 AM): who's thurr
Gonzo (9:23:15 AM): smell mop
Me (9:23:28 AM): smell my poo who?
Gonzo (9:23:36 AM): you suck
Gonzo (9:23:38 AM): geez
Me (9:23:41 AM): what?
Me (9:23:45 AM): is that the punchline?
Me (9:23:49 AM): cause i dont get it